FG/2.0 Title: MOP 2002 Field Guide #front
MOP has always been a quiet little math camp in Lincoln, Nebraska. Over the years, MOPpers have developed several traditions, which were passed on and faithfully kept in future years. One of the traditions is the writing of the MOP Field Guide, a twisted maze of random MOP trivia that, somehow, leads the reader to a description of a MOPper they have in mind. It has never been an easy task to put the field guide together, but it has always been managed.
This year, however, MOP isn't such a quiet little camp anymore. It has grown to nearly six times its former size with over 170 participants, been split up into four classes and spread out over seven dorm floors. Many thought it would be an impossible task just to collect all the facts we would need, much less assemble them into something meaningful. But a few committed MOPpers decided that they would try to uphold the tradition at all costs. They recruited an army of writers and began creating a field guide for MOP 2002.
It's been over three months now, and their hard work has paid off. The MOP 2002 Field Guide is finally here! Right now, only the Black and Blue sections are finished, but the Red and Yellow sections are being worked on and will be here as soon as they're ready. Come inside, and let the journey begin!
>> ENTER <<
Welcome to MOP!
Dani says, "Tiankai says, 'this sucks.'" Go to 72.#3
If he wanted more time spent on the marathon than he spent making it, is extremely rational, lost his laundry to the gnomes living on the eighth floor of Pound, is perpetually in close proximity to Inna, made the USAMO awards group, and is going to Harvard next year, then he's Neil Herriot!#4
If he won best style for the Blue group, played a lot of Mafia in the Piper pit, and was quite possibly the most elusive MOPper in the Black and Blue classes, then he's Philip... er, Chris Milling!#5
If he uses Fourier transforms on everything, owns Settlers and Diplomacy, knows O Fortuna by heart, tried to hack DeepFreeze, proposes impossible problems for rookie contests (but his cubic discriminant inequality on the ELMO wasn't that hard), and won the Clay Math Award for the second year in a row, then he's Mike Hamburg!#6
Seven balls? You must be thinking of someone else. Go back to 21.#8
If he is an awesome soccer player, and he wadded up failed proofs during MOP tests, threw them 20 feet to the trash can, raised his hands in the air, and blew a kiss to the crowd, then he's Jongmin Baek!#10
Sorry! Nobody ever wrote the yellow section of the field guide. Try looking for your MOPper in the group picture.#11
If your MOPper followed Dorothy through Oz, backstabbed and was backstabbed by many countries, fantasized about playing pranks on AG-AM with a ping-pong ball, helped type the hall of fame and the Field Guide, demonstrated how to tie people up for the knot theory marathon, tied Tiankai's door shut, was the proud victim of a Republican hunt, was not converted to anarchism by Riz, did an elevator doorman impression while high on Mountain Dew, sang "Happy Birthday" to Anders (when it was not his birthday), tried to cheat Riz/e out of Pinyan's money, and was one of two non-IMO MOPpers to take a black test, then he's Jeffrey "Toto" Amos!#14
Anders says, "shut up!!!"#16
If his name is an anagram of "icy, I lurk" and almost nothing else, he wrote two problems for the ELMO including the evil number four geometry problem, has successfully balanced an egg without using salt, and is no longer the evilest vet, then he's Ricky Liu!#17
Sorry, 19 is not a Fermat prime. Go to 65537.#20
If he won the award of redundancy award, tortures Anders' juggling balls with Banach-Tarski, juggles while reciting Iago, participates in recursive discussions, beats people at atomic proxy chess and debates the game theory behind Mafia, then he's Daniel Kane!#21
If he has a brother and sister at MOP, sees cyclic quadrilaterals in his sleep, plays bridge, was a MathCounts champion in 1999, and tries to pass off his proofreading to others, then he's Po-Ru Loh!#23
"Matt? This is Nate. Where are you?" ... "Okay, I'll be there in a minute."
Follow your MOPper over to 40.#24
If he threw paper darts, folded $82 in bills into a neat polyhedral shape, reads the Harvard Lampoon's guide to colleges, likes Douglas Adams, and is perpendicular to two other MOPpers with the same last name, then he's (imaginary) Yian Zhang!#25
Mr. Dictator, Mr. Webbrowser performed an illegal repetition of the quote, go to, end quote operation and will be shut down. Mr. Fieldguide suggests that non-existent entity quote, User, end quote should restart Mr. Webbrowser.#27
If she had to go through torture by Andreescu even though she's not on the IMO team, went behind closed doors every night with a bisexual coexistent entity, got a phone call in the middle of MOP asking her if she wanted to go to Math Camp, and is a sillier math nobel, then she's Alison Miller!#28
If she (it?) terrorized Max and Pinyan during the calculus play, coined the nickname "Toto", solved all of Rider's hardest Rush Hour puzzles, tried to sell a list of cute male MOPpers to Jon Pinyan, likes to convert people to radical political persuasions just to convert them back later, gave a lot of jaywalking lessons, yelled "YES!!!" in the middle of one exam and "NO!!!" in the middle of another, went to the bathroom during *both* of Pavel's team contest proofs, likes to play War with herself, kicks butt at Minesweeper, and recited parts of the Sarah Dessert to just about everybody, then she's Liz "Riz/e" Marcil, defending the mathematical world from the forces of uncoolness!#30
Sorry! Nobody ever wrote the red section of the field guide. Try looking for your MOPper in the group picture.#31
If he can juggle 3-4-5, 5-5-5, and 9-1-5-1, has aleph-null (or 19) juggling balls, was disgusted by the proof of Banach-Tarski and is now morally opposed to the Axiom of Choice, and accidentally got an honorable mention on the Putnam two years ago, then he's Anders Kaseorg, and the quote list must be submitted under his door!#32
Sorry, this step has moved. Go to 67.#33
If he has a "1 = 0" shirt, tied for the highest score on the ELMO, and participated in discussions of the empty set at ARML, then he's Aaron Pixton!#37
If your MOPper is almost 6 feet tall and didn't want Riz/e to put that in the Field Guide, had the second-best style in the Blue group, had a layover in Denver en route from Boston to Lincoln and a 20-minute layover in Chicago on the way home, got a perfect 300 USAMO index, ate a lot of raspberries, claims to have bungee-jumped off Pound 13, knows how to open a banana the right way, and spilled a cupful of laundry detergent all over his floor, then he's Mark Lipson!#38
If he communicated with his brother via walkie-talkie, is from Missouri, likes Tolkien and detests Harry Potter, goes to Fiber-nocci lectures, requests copies of vet lectures, and tied his brother on the USAMO, then he's either Nate or Matt Ince! (Sorry, we can't distinguish them either.)#41
If he solves ELMO problems even though he's a vet, gets photographed and sketched while sleeping in class, believes that angle-chasing is superior to brutal force, and can throw a paper ninja star, then he's Tony Zhang, and dis angle equal dis angle equal arpha!#46
If he stopped playing MUD to join the IMO team, moved to Arizona since last MOP, and didn't expect to make the team this year, then he's Tongke "Alex" Xue!#49
If he formed a bisexual coexistent entity named Riz, was bitten by a sheep during the calculus play, fought with his other half over Silent Football rules, is great at Mao and Egyptian Rat Screw, invented bonus points and dumbass points, defined push-ups, and nobody wants to play Molecule with him, then he's Ricky "2Riz/pi" Biggs, and you all get a penalty card for ridiculous stupidity!#51
If he helped tie Tiankai in his room, played a lot of settlers, played Quake in a way that made his opponents wish their mothers had never met their fathers, made fun of his roommate, and learned to tie a sheep shank at MOP, then he's Nick Ma!#52
If he gave up going to MOP in favor of spending six weeks at RSI with Stalker Girl, tells stories of the Princeton math department, and was never seen again after the awards in Washington, then he is Steve Byrnes, and we hope he is still alive.#53
If he has more hair than Alison, has the highest Chip's Challenge score in the world, plays ultimate frisbee without his shoes, got 61 'yes' votes against 59 'no' and won the Vote Pie Guy category of the Hall of Fame, is the benchmark for Stolp-worthiness, and invented the post-it-note elevator game, then you can be 31.4% certain that he's David "pie guy" Stolp! Vote pie guy!#55
Sorry, that number is composite. Prime-testing is difficult; try proving the $620 conjecture in order to make it easier.#56
If she used to have a Steve Byrnes Fan Club page, plans to create a Gabriel Carroll Fan Club page, said she'd have the children of all but two of last year's MOPpers (including both females), draws pears on chairs, and signs her letters (all 100 of them) "S.G.", then she's Eve "Stalker Girl" Drucker, and she's finally made her mark on MOP!#61
If he was at Physics Camp before going to MOP, hung out with James Albrecht's roommate more than James Albrecht did himself, and was the Rookie of the Year, then he's Daniel Gulotta!#63
If he wrote the number theory problem for the ELMO, never was on time to class, played ultimate frisbee, frequently spoke with a Romanian accent, and makes up words on the fly in anagrams, then he's Ben Conlee!#64
Sorry! Nobody ever wrote the staff section of the field guide. Try looking for your MOPper in the group picture.#66
What? Are you sure you've checked your calculations? Go to the Tum-tum tree to rest and think it over.#67
Sorry, this step has moved. Go to 26.#68
This sentence is pointless. So is this one. Vote pie guy.#71
If she had her nose broken by a Frisbee, reads Pride and Prejudice to Neil (from whom she is inseparable), helped write the knot theory marathon, is going to Harvard next year, brought a blanket to class in order to stay warm, and likes to play Gluck on a team by herself, then she's Inna Zakharevich!#72
Alison says, "Dani says, 'Tiankai says, "this sucks."'" Go to 15.#73
If he is a chicken wing flavor, pretends he doesn't know anything, was not the smallest MOPper, had to do push-ups when he arrived late to class, makes triangles to solve algebraic inequalities, is trying to fill the void left by Yan Zhang, and had his door tied up by a band of malicious knot-theorists, then he's Tiankai Liu, and that is mad cheating!#76
If he was banished from Catan, actually studied (gasp!), goes to a high school that can be identified using only two letters, was normally killed in one of the first few rounds in Mafia, and turned in Abbott-scratch on the ELMO, then he's Tim Abbott, and "No, Tim, you're wrong!"#77
Tiankai says, "this sucks." Go to 2.#78
If your MOPper is the first recorded case of a singular personality disorder, is allowed to mess up its pronouns, can literally be in two places at once, is good at Mafia and Silent Football even though it logically shouldn't be, holds ice cream cones over its own head, is a foot taller than itself, and redefined "being yourself," "self-esteem," "talking to yourself," "slapping yourself," etc., then it's Riz, and who is this "you" I speak of?!
If he invented his own notation for expressing sums of symmetric products, made the honors group but not the IMO team, has gone to IOI and IPhO, went to RSI last year, and is going to Harvard next year, then he's Gregory Price!#81
Find the next Fermat prime. Start at 2^2^5 + 1.#2^2^5plus1
No, no, everyone knows that aleph-null equals 19; go to 19.
Oh, no! Your car has mysteriously disappeared. Walk over to Theyslackistan.#c
Wow! You proved the Continuum Hypothesis. Go publish your results at 65537.#lincoln
Sorry, you got us kicked out of the Selleck computer lab. We're going to have to make you start over. Go back to 1.#pound8
Sorry, this floor is off-limits to MOPpers. I hope Chuck doesn't catch you. Go to 61.#theyslackistan
This is boring. Go play games in Pacmanistan.#tumtumtree
And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!